So, I am a nice, honest, caring, compassionate, giving, hardworking, loving, a christian, would honestly, despite my body issues, give someone the shirt off my back. But tonight had an in depth conversation with my sister about heaven and hell and where we are going to ultimately spend eternity. I, honestly, because of what I listed first and foremost in this blog, thought I was a shoe in, but am I?? What truly does it take to get an invite to the ultimate party? I actually don’t know, but I think it’s alot more than what I listed. I am all of those things, but, I am not living the life that God has given me to the fullest. Does that piss him off? I definately don’t want to do that. Am I wasting the most precious gift he has given to me, life? I can remember taking weeks to pick out a gift for a close friend, I knew it was something that she would cherish and she showed such appreciation when she opened it. Months later while visiting her home she asked me to get something out of the cabinet and right in front of my eyes was the gift still in the gift bag tucked away. My heart sank, is that how God feels with those of us that simply waste the gift of LIFE?? Tonight I have realized that I want to go to heaven but, more importantly, I want to please God and I want him to be proud of me. It may sound corny, but it’s how I break it down for my simple mind to understand. I have started to read the bible, cover to cover and it is difficult. It’s alot of begating and names and I want to get to reading scriptures that teach me things and help me with day to day life. So, my sissy, with all her wisdom, suggested I start with The New Testament instead. At the end of the day, I don’t just want to say that I read the bible, I want to know the bible and know Him because I don’t want His heart to sink.