Back for a bit

Moo It’s been awhile since I have been in here and I really don’t think anyone follows me, but it is therapeutic to write down what I’m going through.  I didn’t look at my last post to see what it was about, so this would be a continuation. So I will just start. My kidneys have been up and down as far as function % goes and for now I’m in stage 4 renal failure. Talks of dialysis is still on the table,but thankfully I don’t need it as of now. My doctors also found tumors on my stomach called carcinoid tumors and they were malignant stage 1 cancer. The prognosis is nearly 100% in all patients so my doctor removed the three with no problem. About a month ago he went back to make sure he had gotten them all and unfortunately found two more and removed them successfully as well. I will have to have a repeat surgery in 6 months to check for recurrence. In addition to this, I pave had warts on my backside for about 3 months and I was told because my higher dose of steroids it would not heal and I just had to deal with it. Well, the steroids went down and the warts didn’t get better. I went to a dermatologist and he froze the area and was planning on doing several rounds of freezing over several months. When I returned after a month for the second freezing I told him the area was no better and it was actually worse than before the freezing. At that point he suggested that the best bet would be to just have it removed, it’s a cluster of warts. So he referred me to a colorectal surgeon to get his opinion and he advised me that th needed to be removed and tested. Unfortunately, the hospital he is affiliated with isn’t in my network for my insurance so he couldn’t do,it.  He then referred me to a general surgeon and he is going to perform the surgery in about a week or so, I will finally have this issue taken care of. It’s so weird that it seems like every part of my body has something wrong with it. Lupus affects my joints and my skin, I where issues with my scalp, my ears, my hands, my feet and ankles, my stomach, my vajj, and now my butt. It sucks to hurt literally everywhere. Also on top of that I had an argument with my sister and I have learned from talking to my bible study mentor that we are sisters and the bottom line is we love each other. We will argue we will yell and we will shout but we love each other and I had forgotten about that. I will be seeing her this weekend. I’ve also been staying with my parents for awhile. This hasn’t set well with my sister but the truth is I feel more comfortable here especially when I’m sick. My mom also prefers for me to be here because she doesn’t want to have to come back and forth from her house and my house to help me.  And I have company when I am at home I’m alone and I don’t even have my dog because I can’t take care of him properly. I’ve asked my mom if she’s ready for me to go or if I’ve over stayed my welcome. She says I’m her child and there is no way I could over stay anything, I’m always welcome here. I  love my mom. My lupus has been ok, I think it’s pretty stable and it’s time for my re evaluation for disability and I got a call that based on the information thus far they couldn’t determine if I was still disabled. So I went to see their psychiatrist for a evaluation, I. Not sure if it helped or not but I also had my PCP do a physical so I’m hoping this will help me. If,they deny me my lawyer will step in to assist me once again. It’s scary becaus I have bought a home and all of the bills that come along with that. So I depend on my disability to keep my independence. I know with all of my heart I couldn’t hold down a job working a typical 8hr day 5days a weEk. I would need the company to make several exceptions for me during my shift and this is actually what lead me to getting fired from my last job. 15 years I gave to that place and fired because of something I can’t control. I’m sleepy people night.

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One thought on “Back for a bit

  1. I do follow you! I’m so sad to hear your having a hard time but I’m glad you have your mum’s support. I hope you also work things out with your sister you will be in my prayers 💜

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